Tuesday 3 March 2009

Record Unsupported Commute to Work

Time: 28mins 32 seconds, unsupported.

This morning, Lee Nailing set the record for his commute to work, unsupported. This means that he completed the gruelling ride with no support team, carrying all his supplies and water, and picking up every single piece of litter he encountered along the route. Lee reports here, now, below. Here:

I woke up feeling fresh at 7.31am and wolfed down a bowl of my sponsor's fantastic Kellogg's Bran-Flakes. I then ironed my work shirt for the day and had a shower with my sponsor's great product, Original Source Lime. I climbed aboard my Trek 4400 Alpha Aluminium to complete my commute to work. Sprinting out of my front door, I felt I could be on for a record time when the traffic lights at the bottom of my road didn't change to red: This could be the day.

Halfway through my commute, I came across a woman trying to show me who owned the roads. I certainly taught her a lesson, by leaving her in a trail of my shit as I accidentally followed through when I farted as I passed her, straining with the effort.

Coming up to the offices, I knew the traffic light sequence was crucial as one red light would ruin my time. When I saw the lights change to amber, I gunned it, knowing my I was risking a £60 fixed penalty notice but fuelled by the adrenaline of winning (which I regularly suffer from). The risk was worth it, and I did a skid as I pulled into the office car park with a record time.

To celebrate my record time, I did another skid with a turn in the car park, before trouncing into the office to beat my chest and claim bragging rights to my commute into work. These worker bees will never know the feeling of winning.

I rule.

2 comments:

  1. You are so totally on it I can't believe you are so quick!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bristol Semi-pro24 April 2009 at 17:05

    wow! you shreaded and beasted your self in one ride

    ReplyDelete